Peter Kane – Relationship Theorist and author The Monogamy Challenge

Happiness, Joy and Connection

Happiness is not derived from inner joy and feelings of love alone, it also stems from connection. Connection is about being in our right Relationship with others and the environment. Happiness comes from being able to hold connection with ourselves and others at the same time. It is about self-soothing and having the strength to want. It is not just about inner joy, it is about holding the structure between ourselves and others. Connection is about the structural integrity of a relationship. It is about enjoying what suits us, and also about honoring the connection. The deeper pursuit of happiness then takes us into some real stuff; like fairness, equality, credit, and regard. These grittier real world issues do not need to pull us into right and wrong power struggles. We can instead use this knowing to meet and acknowledge our beloveds, not because we are people pleasers who seek to create secure connection by obligating others, but because we have the courage to give our relationships the strong structures we seek.

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Peter Kane - Counselor • Coach • Relationship Theorist
peter@peterkane.org | 425-802-2050
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